Do you ever talk with someone, trying to smile and make constructive suggestions, while your brain shouts 'I hate you!' over and over and over? I really hate some people. We all must feel this way once in a while.

Well, my shifting is acting up again. So frustrating! It was working fine for a couple weeks, and now its two down, one up to get where I want to be. AGAIN. This has been going on for months. Pretty much everything has been replaced, including the deraileur, the cables, the cable housings, the chain . . . what is the problem!? I had no problem with the shifting for the first year, why can't it work now?

The only thing I can think of is that changing out wheels and cassettes for racing is doing something to the calibration. I didn't do that last year. Hmmm.

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Last night we were watching Liege-Bastogne-Liege -- we need to get all the cycling off the DVR before le Tour starts taking up room. I forget how much I adore the one day races, they are SO exciting. L-B-L ends with Andy and Frank Schleck, Valverde and Rebellin in a four man breakaway. Andy attacks and Rebellin [what a monster!] reels him in solidly, and of course the instant they catch him, Frank attacks. Phil refers to this as "the old ding-dong." How much do you love that!

Awesome xXx women.

Sherman Park WAS fun -- I think we put on a great race. Lots of primes, deep payouts, long races and lots of races. I raced the women's cat 4/masters race at 8:40 am, then I worked registration for three and a half hours, then I got ready and raced the women's open -- very cool of the organizers [Stockmaster!] to give cat 4 women two chances to race!

We had 19 women in the 40 minute cat 4/masters race, 15 of them cat 4s, and 10 xXx women. And for once we didn't just ride around and around at varying [slow] speeds. Cecile and Emily attacked in the second lap and got a good separation. Seri chased and unfortunately took two non xXx racers with her. Then Seri got dropped from the break and rapidly dropped from the pack. Then Cecile drifted backwards to the pack -- so just Emily, a Turin girl and a Tati girl up the road. Gigi -- our captain on the road -- gave me the nod to bridge, which I did easily. When I got there, I pulled Emily off the front and made the Turin and Tati girls do the bulk of the pulling while I sat in. I challenged the Tati racer in a sprint prime and lost roundly, so I knew we had to drop them.

With two laps to go, four or five more xXx girls bridged up -- perfect timing! We'd tired out our competitors and now had overwhelming numbers. I attacked at the start of the last lap and with six girls in black sitting on, neither Turin nor Tati had the will to chase. I rode the lap as hard as I could manage and crossed the line in first place! And this year I raised an arm in victory.

Our sprinter Anna took second, Denise took third -- first in 35+-- and the Turin girl crossed fourth. My awesome teammates set me up for this win and I'm happy that I was able to make good on the opportunities they created. All in all, an interesting and animated race.

The women's cat 1-2-3-4 open was at 3:30 pm, so lots of time to rest and recover. And while my legs felt good, my lungs still burned with the efforts of the morning. We had 10 women for the 60 minute race, and my goal was to score some more upgrade points. And with four teammates in the race, my chances were good -- if I had the endurance.

We rode in uneventful circles for 15 or so minutes. Gigi and Greta pretty much towing the pack. Then the first prime was announced [socks] and there was a contentious sprint among the cat 3 girls that Greta won effortlessly. Francine, cat 2 riding for Alberto's, took the opportunity to attack with Greta. I followed wheels up to them and counted six in the pack -- too many. So I was ready when we came round again for the next prime sprint [which Greta also calmly won] -- when Francine took off and Greta was right with her, I chased hard -- Beth blocking for me -- and caught on with them. The three of us worked well together, all taking hard pulls. I felt I was weakest of the three, I was the only one who'd raced earlier, and just didn't want to get dropped. But I took my pulls and made them count. As we rotated through, I could hear Francine breathing hard and was comforted to know that this was hard for her too.

After 10 or 15 minutes of pain, we started asking how much time we had on the pack -- to find that we had a minute and a half and were less than 30 seconds from lapping them. !!! So we did lap them, which was pretty awesome. And here is where my fatigue made me stupid. I should have realized that Francine would take the opportunity to try to drop Greta and me. I should have ridden right by the pack and kept on pushing hard. But I braked and sat in and Francine immediately attacked and Greta went with her and I could not catch them. I already had third place and that was the best I was hoping for anyway. So I sat up and told the girl on my wheel that she could chase them for fourth place, but I was done.

I sat in for the rest of the race, attacking periodically to soften up the field for the sprint. Frankly, I'm not sure why they bothered chasing me -- they should have let me go waste my energy. But they did, so I took advantage. When it came to the sprint, I went early with Beth on my wheel. She came around me and took fourth, and I actually crossed the line third in the sprint -- Coach had said that going hard before the corner into a short finishing stretch was a good tactic for me, and this proved he was right.

However, the officials were pissed that I'd taken part in the sprint. They told me in no uncertain terms that I should have sat back and let the lapped riders do their thing and not gotten in the way of the cameras. Which, if I ever lap a field again, I'll totally do. Sorry. [Although JT lapped the field at the track a week and a half ago and then led out Matt and Kirby. Track must be different.]

Thanks to a little help from my friends, I scored 5 more upgrade points! That puts me at 12 -- 15 if they count my win at Sherman Park last year. I now feel confident that I will get the 20 I need. Yay. Thanks, girls!!!

Sherman Park tomorrow! It's going to be FUN to have so many teammates in the field.

Maybe its not a nutrition thing. I ate properly yesterday and still had that weird shaky, altered feeling on the ride home. What IS that?

Sadly, no track tonight as I'm racing Sherman Park on Saturday. We should have a ton of xXx women, which will be super fun.

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Are you ever not at all hungry -- full from your recovery meal an hour or two ago, say -- but still get that breathless 'high' feeling that if you don't throw calories at will get worse and worse and lead to a killer migraine and fatigue that lasts through the next day or so? Its hard to eat when you're stuffed. And hard to quiet that voice that says you've eaten enough. I wish I had someone to tell me exactly what to eat and when, sort of an uber-nutritionist. Who doubled as my soigneur. Massages and pasta . . . mmmmmmm.

Can I just say that I heart Greta? I heart Greta! She's in town for a few days and came on the women's ride this morning. She's so strong! I mean, of course she is, she trains at the Olympic Training Center and is going to Beijing for the Paralympics. It was just so fun to ride with her - a good challenge. And then she joined me for sprint practice and gave me some pointers. It's going to be fun to race with her at Sherman Park.

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Riding home from work last night I had that weak, shaky feeling again. And I remembered that this happened regularly last year riding home. I think its a nutrition thing -- my lunch yesterday was not adequate for my level of activity. I need to resist the urge to skimp thinking I can lose weight that way. That's not the way.

OK, I know that the lovely weather brings nine cajillion people out to walk, run, skate, ride and wander blindly about the Lakefront Path. But if I call out a timely "on your left" why [oh why!] does that get a snitty "go around me!" from the unpredictable path hog, rather than a simple step to the right? I mean, I'm obviously TRYING to go around you. And I'm trying to do it safely. And why was Mr. Snitty wearing full cycling kit to rollerblade anyway?

It makes me long for dark mornings with a 30 degree wind chill.